Tuesday, July 31, 2007

for the sake of the empire


the good/evil Darth Vader Ant Godhead on the couch is telling me I should WORK

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

"Chiiiiiill, Winston"


I need to chill and FoCUS.. FOCUS FOCUS FOCUS. For the past couple of months I haven't been able to harness my energy into a single piece from start to finish. This can be really discouraging because I can't seem to land on any solid ground. All I've been able to do is dish out countless line drawings of what appears to be nonsense. This is not my brain on drugs, this is my brain when it doesn't know what to do with itself.
Also. Here are two visual rides through a couple of paintings I did a while back. There's no intent on making these clips look professional so you will be subjected to a shaky camera if you choochoochoose to watch...and if you don't like Bjork then don't even bother.

AAAAANNNNNNND this one

Thursday, July 19, 2007

1962 Collabo


Collaborations!!! ahhhH!!!! I want to "do" more of THEM. So far this is my favorite performance so farOUT. This image is only half of the actual piece but since I don't have the original I decided to finish it off as a sort of collage. The blue strip on the right was the latest addition and it's pretty much the photo of the original art covering part of Ilya Repin's painting of Jesus in the desert. Eli Sipsas started it off with some prints of his designs on wood. I worked from an Edward S. Curtis photograph and tried to adjust the image as best as I could using Eli's design elements and the color palette he had initially established. Andrew Hem added a couple of circles for some embellishment. This is one of the fastest paintings I've ever done, Eli is a witness.. and ironically I was stoned off my mind (thank you Eli). I usually can't paint under MJ's influence but once in a while... OOOLAALAAA! As Usual there are a couple of hidden elements but they are in the state of becoming and I don't want to seal their fate.

BLACK ELK SPEAKS
BLACK ELK SPEAKS
BLACK ELK SPEAKS
....and his vision is alive

More BiRDS and raison d'etre


this is probably the best buuuuuurd I've ever drawn. If you are what you eat then we can see this bird's been pecking at some seeds and worms... there's the back of a bull coming out of the side of its head... maybe this raven liked to eat bugs off the bull or buffalo's back. I stumbled upon foreign territory on this one and I have yet to fully explore the ideas I found with this drawing. Not only is making new connections important but also realizing their relevance, synthesizing into a digestive whole, and presenting others with an alternative way to see and understand the world.... IS..... My raision d'etre (reason to live)

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Birds

I'm obsessed with birds. Maybe I'm jealous that they can fly and I can only do it in my head. Plane rides don't count. Dreams are the best. Some feel so real so true... my Peter Pan syndrome. I feel I've been saying goodbye to Jasmyn for a long time now...even before we had to part. Our relationship was such an obvious landmark in my life/art. It's very hard for me not to think of my art as a manifestation of my innermost personal struggles. I read somewhere that the ironic thing is that the most personal art turns out to be the most universal. Her and shrooms go hand in hand...my eyes were opened to a world of extreme complexity and diversity...where nothing is stable or easily understood. If I can't get that across with my work then it's all hopeless. I hope some day to achieve a serene simplicity in my work (maybe along the lines of Turner?) but like Saul Williams says.. "Out of Chaos comes order". I already figured that the only way to reach that simplicity ( and when I do reach it ...it should be foreign yet slightly familiar to the onlooker) is to extend my thoughts beyond my present state of comfort. Ask more questions, draw more lines. The day this happens will be like John Muir finding calypso borealis in a swamp... a sign of hope,beauty in the dark, in the worst of places. But I have to get lost in the swamp first. This is the last drawing I did dealing with our relationship. She's holding her index fingers as the last moment before separation. Arrows flying towards her. Outlines of rooftops inside of her...the home she left and looks for, forever wonderwander.The bird near her hands is one of two I found dead. This was really strange...her and I found it together and when she left I found another one near my house, almost identical and I burried it. I had never seen that type of bird before those two instances and have never seen any other one like it since. Events like these are the reason why I find everything to be symbolic. Everything matters

Field Trips

I can't stress enough how important highschool was for me in terms of shaping my whole outlook on life, opening my mind and giving me a glimpse of endless possibilities. I would not be the same person if it weren't because of those 4 years I spent going downtown, waking up at 6 in the morning to enter a building full of some of the most creative and beautiful people I've ever met. Robin Whitelock was the light of my middle school years. A wonderful art teacher who incouraged me to push myself and told me to apply to New World because it was the best. New World had a legacy of SICK artists...some floors decorated with great paintings that do not cease to amaze me til this day. The best part was that all the arts were mixed up... we would take academic classes with kids that were musicians, theater students, dancers and after 5th period when most highschools would dismiss their students we had an extra 3 hours of respective art classes.
In the visual arts department we would go on fieldtrips a couple of times a year to paint at the beach and other outdoor places. During one of the trips I was walking around and saw a man asleep sitting on a foldout chair. Seemed as if I had just intruded in this man's house... except his house had no walls. One of the many homeless people in Miami. I don't know this man's story, I didn't want to wake him up so I just snapped a couple of shots...and left my shrink-wrapped sandwhich next to him. Actually that's an understatement.. I threw it at him but it fell by his feet. The subsequent painting was started at home in my studio on two separate pieces of wood. To prepare the surface I used a lot of gesso layers letting it drip mainly on what would later become the background and placed. the pieces of wood on the floor where I proceeded to dance on it with my bare feet. You can still see some footprints mainly on the bottom right section. It's a shame this piece is in such shitty condition but then again I think it works with the subject matter. There was no Uncle Sam poster in the background but the American flag WAS there. I just added a big ass burnt bullet hole on it cause I felt like it. This is still one of my favorite pieces not only because it captured a slice of real life...none of it was staged..but also because it was a lot of fun to work on ( and to step on ). I believe my footprints might have inspired my good friend Matt Krawcheck to step on his work as well except he used house and oil paint found in dumpsters and that's why he's more badass than I am :D.

Friday, July 13, 2007

WoW!

So I'm on this thing.. I'm on it and I'm in it .. who's behind it?? This is pretty exciting stuff cause now I can just ramble on and write about my work or cupcakes and it won't be tucked away away somewhere like in myspace. If this goes well I can see giving up the myspace crack altogether.. people need their space.. I guess, but how can you quit crack?? This reminds me of when I used to have a deadjournal.. R.I.P dj ...I'll never feel so "underground" again. Being back home in Miami puts me back in touch with the elderly.. and by that I just mean my grandparents. Today I took grandma to pledge and get her citizenship "diploma". She was so lost. I had to tell the guards she had Alzheimer's disease and I needed to be her guide. Becoming a citizen (KANE!) is such a strange and almost comical process. Well I could just about laugh at anything (especially myself)...but seriously, you get little american flags, you're in a giant room sitting shoulder to shoulder with people from all over the world and you watch a video of Pres. BUSHwacker telling you how impressed he is that you passed the test and all this other shit he's reading from a teleprompter followed by a video of sweeping views of the U.S. landscape, close-ups of smiling kids, people of different races and such while listening to the song "Proud To Be An American". I think the most disturbing part is all the military references ... seeing my grandmother pledge to take up arms if necessary and protect the nation... the whole ceremony seems like a really empty ritual to me ...." I swear I will protect this abstract entitiy I call the United States "... or am I really saying ... " I will protect whatever government happens to be in power because they might offer some kind of protection to me ". I don't want to sound ungrateful, but there are many factors that have contributed to my life here in the U.S. and I can't just generalize like I'm being told I should... I see through the cheesy intentions to make me feel patriotic and shout out "Sieg Heil" to the flag. I almost feel sorry for the people that buy into that flag-waving america vs. the world shit. I feel sorry because they don't know any better. Then again, we all have to buy into someone's story... so how do you choose?
Here's part of my story.
...more of an attempt.
I would like to explain through this site my fascination with things that are hidden, ambiguity and metamorphosis. My work has been compared a lot to Salvador Dali with reason. My dad was my first influence but Dali was my first favorite painter. I'm still discovering new things when looking at paintings I thought I was familiar with. In a sense that's what I hope to accomplish... works that refuse to be easily understood or pigeonholed and that with time, will evolve into diaries that other generations will read and perhaps better understand or misunderstand ha!
I decided to get things started with a drawing I did my freshman year of College at Art Center. This one is titled " my friends and I are not superheroes" and is basically a drawing of the 4 original roommates in the Fall of 02. Pasadena, CA. I'm the freak with the muscles, behind me is Edgar Cuarezma ( GRRR), then the lovely ms. Jane Kim and to the right my best friend since highschool David Olivera. Too many adventures to mention ... but... this drawing is slightly prophetic. David jumping on a paper boat made out of a letter from his gf (La Domi as he would call her) with a tidal wave about to hit is symbolic of what happened in his relationship later on. The tire marks on Grr's face are a reference to getting run over by a car when he was a kiddo. Jane and I always fucked with him cause he loved to sleep ( I do too!!) and David would call him the gentle giant. Well here he's in a trance watching sheep bounce on Jane's head ...trying to reach his favorite dream state, dreaming of sheep with hats labled LuLu...a reference to his love at the time. As for me I'm just some weirdo trying to be the captain of my own mutating body and mind, floating like a balloon... as for Janey, well only she knows.